donor agency

Part of our work is honoring the unique experiences of the humans we are helping create. As such, we are constantly seeking input and advice from the donor conceived community. 

Being donor conceived can mean different things to different people, as their experience is as varied and unique as any other child. Some people who were donor-conceived feel a strong sense of connection to their biological family, while others don’t even think about it. Some are curious about their genetic origins and seek out information about the donor, while others are not interested in learning more. Some people may struggle with questions about identity and family, while others may not feel that their donor conception has had a significant impact on their life. Overall, the experience of being donor conceived can be complex and nuanced, and can vary depending on their upbringing and the level of openness and honesty within their family. 

In this article, we  share the unique perspectives of four donor-conceived adults.

The respondents:

• Emma is a nurse, author, and donor conceived adult who has been vocal about her life experiences 
• Jackson is a 30-something, donor conceived engineer in Florida
• Libby is a donor conceived small business owner from Massachusetts 
• Melissa is egg donor conceived and the VP of Development at the US Donor Conceived Council

How did you find out you were donor-conceived?

Emma: I have always known that I was donor conceived or at least I have no memory of not knowing. My parents made a book about their long journey to create a family and how lucky they were to have me – we read the book as a nighttime story or whenever I wanted to from, I was 2-3 years old. This book meant that we don’t really know when I understood but we have drawings I made of egg and supercells from when I was 5 years old. 

Jackson: I found out I was donor conceived in a funny way, actually. I was 17, about to graduate high school, and I was sitting at a Dairy Queen with my identical twin brother and we both got a Facebook friend request from the same person at the same time, so we thought that was really weird. We responded and asked how she knew us. She said she was our sister, and we didn't believe her - so we asked her the name of our parents. She got it right, so then we went home and asked our dad what this was all about. He then let us know that he was waiting until we were 18 (so a few months from then) to let us know, but they had used an egg donor/surrogate to conceive us after my mom had a number of late term miscarriages. I never felt any resentment towards any party involved (my parents, the egg donor, or the egg donor's children) but it was a bit jarring at the time and definitely weird for her to have reached out to us that way. 

Libby: My moms were very transparent about a multitude of things as I grew up. While they couldn't always keep up with my speedily-moving brain and mouth, they tried their best and always explained things to me thoroughly. The first conversation I remember having about it was in first grade. We had to do some type of family tree assignment - and despite living in one of the most progressive towns at the time, I didn’t have anyone with two moms or two dads in my class. I felt alone and confused when I saw everyone drawing and talking about their mom and dad. I’m sure there were kids who had just one parent or another family member who had guardianship, but I was so focused on why my tree didn’t look the same. 

When I brought my tree home, I had questions and they gave me answers in a developmentally appropriate way. I asked so many questions and they answered every single thing. They connected me with children in the area that were donor conceived or adopted. As time went on, I started to understand that families are families and that’s the end of that. It doesn’t matter what your family looks like, as long as there’s safety and love in it – “love makes a family” was said frequently in my home.‍

I started to understand that families are families and that’s the end of that. It doesn’t matter what your family looks like, as long as there’s safety and love in it – “love makes a family” was said frequently in my home.‍

I thought it was so cool that my donor was willing to help families, and I thought it was equally cool that I had more siblings! I would always wonder what they’d look like and how much we’d look alike. I didn’t think much about the donor as much as I did the siblings.

My two brothers had different donors than me, so we’d always ask our moms about the prominent features that each donor had. For legal reasons, they were unable to disclose much because they weren’t given much information, as the donor wanted to be an “identity release” type of donation – I would be able to make contact with him once I turned 18 if I wanted to. I didn’t have much desire for that though, I just wanted to know my siblings.

Melissa: My parents told my brother and me three weeks before I turned 22. It was so unexpected that at first, I thought they were playing a joke on us. My mother said that it had been on her mind all week and she just decided it was time to come clean, so after a long day of doing post-Christmas returns together she sat us down to break the news.

How has being donor-conceived impacted your life?

Emma: It has meant different things to me throughout life so far. Most significantly it has made me feel special, wanted, and extremely loved in my family. As a child I spoke a lot about it and tried to explain to people whenever relevant. Then I had a period where we talked a lot about features I have that might come from my donor. It was not in any negative way, more curious. As an adult I found out that I was lactose intolerant which I inherited from the donor. Before I started to share my story, my conception did not impact my adult life very much. Today it is a huge part of my life trying to create resources and sharing my experience for others to have some inspiration to navigate the difficult decisions of donor conception 

Jackson: It really hasn't impacted my life in any way. After we found out we were donor conceived, we took a bit to process it and then moved on with life pretty much the exact same and went off to college. My mom is my mom, and I'm glad my parents were able to find a way to have us. We don't really ever talk about being donor conceived, but I will say there is some mystery around my medical history and if anything has popped up in the donor's family history since. I'm sure I could ask my parents to look into it if I really wanted. 

Libby: Being donor conceived impacted my life because I am here, as cheesy as that sounds! My donor was able to help my moms have children and I will always be thankful for that. I’m so unbelievably proud of the family I have and I’m so happy to have expanded my family all across the US by connecting with my donor siblings. One of my donor siblings recently moved closer to me and we met in July of this year, and I consider her to be one of my best friends. I am incredibly passionate about inclusive, accessible, and affirming healthcare – including reproduction services – and being donor conceived is one of the driving forces behind that.

Melissa: Growing up, I spent years feeling like something was… off. Like I didn’t completely see myself on the maternal side of my family. When I first found out I was donor conceived, it was very surreal. I remember just driving around that night in a haze. In a lot of ways though, learning the truth made so much sense. It was almost a relief to know that I wasn’t crazy for feeling out of place my whole life. Nothing had been wrong with me. There was an explanation that entire time. But, it wasn’t a fix-all. There are certain day-to-day experiences that are unique to being donor conceived. Before I knew I was DC, I was unknowingly giving incorrect family medical history to all of my doctors. Between learning the truth and connecting with the donor, I had to tell so many doctors that I actually didn’t know anything about my maternal side. Luckily now I’ve successfully connected with the donor, but so many DCP don’t have that luxury either because they can’t find the donor, the donor has passed away, or the donor refuses to speak to them.

What’s your relationship like with the donor and their family?

Emma: I don’t know my donor. He was anonymous and I have never wanted to learn more about him, and I have never done any DNA testing. I think about him with gratitude but that is all I need so far. 

Jackson: My twin brother and I are Facebook friends with a few of them, since that day at Dairy Queen. We had a few back and forth conversations with them but that's it. We're happy to let them loosely follow along our lives via Facebook but that's the extent I'm comfortable with. I haven't had the desire to meet them or the egg donor in person.

Libby: I do not currently communicate with my donor, but my oldest donor sibling reached out to him and he said he was willing to talk with us whenever. I connected with a majority of my siblings through Ancestry, oddly enough – some of those siblings had already talked with each other for awhile, and we would all just be added to the Facebook group chat once more of us popped up! We did lots of digging to find our donor (we had some information about where he went to school, the years he went, the fraternity he was in, what sports he played, and some other stuff – but no name). I felt like a detective trying to cross-reference the little information we had. Some of us feel differently about talking to the donor, which is completely understandable; so, we agreed to table it for a little while and revisit the idea at a later date. I feel indifferent about contacting him. I’m open to doing it but I don’t feel this burning desire. 

Melissa: It actually took me three years to contact the donor. I dreaded the possibility that she might react poorly. I really didn’t want to be in a position where I was trying to delicately explain the harmlessness of wanting to just know who my own relatives are. Luckily though, I never had to do that. The donor was very receptive to contact. She even acknowledged on her own that it was her ethical duty to share her family medical history, and that I was probably much more surprised to learn I was donor conceived than she was to get a message from me. That validation was meaningful if only because it’s a rare experience for DCP [via anonymous donation]. Now, we talk occasionally over the phone; she lives far from me so we’ve never met in person. She has no siblings or children, which probably makes it easier in some ways. Since we’re both adults, there’s a hint of “what do we do now?” energy, but overall it’s a very civil acquaintanceship and it’s been really cool getting to see how many traits and quirks we share.

What would you tell an intended parent considering using donor eggs to conceive?

Emma: I would tell them to start talking to their child as soon as possible. I think this is very valuable for both parent and child. The parents as they get to rehearse and get familiar with sharing their story before the child starts to ask difficult questions. For the child so that they grow up knowing about their conception story. Research has shown that this is the best for the child and has also been very important to me and my relationship to my parents. 

Jackson: Go for it! It's an incredible thing that can allow you to have the child you always wanted. I'd encourage them to have conversations with the children about being donor conceived at a younger age so it is something they intrinsically know as opposed to finding out at a Dairy Queen at age 17, but I don't think it has to be a requirement if that's not what you want to do as long as you are open and ready to having a conversation with them down the line.

Libby: Research the agency you’re considering to use! Find one that sits well with you. You deserve to feel heard and supported - not just by your loved ones, but by the professionals who will be assisting you throughout this journey. When it comes to egg donation – there are so many companies out there, but a lot of them come at a steep cost and lack psychological support. They feel very transactional because of that. Please be transparent and honest with your child(ren) when they start asking questions. Be willing to explore those feelings and questions with them, whatever they may be. There’s some wonderful children’s literature out there about being donor-conceived and it can help pique their curiosity at an early age. Connect with other families that have donor-conceived children. Remember that using donor eggs does not make you any less of a parent – and that your journey is beautiful and valid.

Melissa:  Overall, I would urge all prospective parents to go with as little anonymity as possible. It really makes a world of a difference to a donor conceived person to have that access and information about their origins from day one. It’s also crucial that you listen to, and learn from, donor conceived adults. This especially includes the ones you don’t want to listen to. The industry that creates us is systematically flawed, so even if you love your children more than anything in the world, that won’t prevent them from having DC-related problems. Learning about the experiences of DCP will ultimately help you support your donor conceived children. Building a family with donor conception doesn’t stop when the baby is born. It will be a part of your family story for the rest of your life, and for the rest of your children’s lives.

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‍Cofertility is a human-first fertility ecosystem rewriting the egg freezing and egg donation experience. Our Family by Co platform serves as a more transparent, ethical egg donor matching platform. We are obsessed with improving the family-building journey — today or in the future — and are in an endless pursuit to make these experiences more positive. Create a free account today!

Lauren here, CEO of Cofertility and someone who's thought a lot about building my own Jewish family. I know many of our Jewish intended parents are asking themselves questions about Jewish identity and egg donation, so I asked my sister-in-law, Rabbi Julie Bressler to weigh in. Her thoughts are below!

If you are Jewish and beginning the egg donor process, you may be wondering whether it’s important that your egg donor is Jewish as well. Is it the egg donor, the gestational carrier, or the social parent that passes down a person’s Jewish status? These are questions that really didn’t exist until recently as modern medicine has allowed us new ways to build families. So let’s dive in.

Many Jewish intended parents, whether religiously observant or not, want to make sure that their children will be Jewish as well. Remember, Judaism can be both a religion and/or an ethnicity (some even consider it an ethno-religious identity!). With adoption, when a Jewish family adopts a child born to a non-Jewish birth mother, that child can become Jewish through conversion. Is the same true for egg donation? It depends on who you ask, but more than anything, it’s up to you. 

What the Torah says about egg donation

There is no clear injunction in the Torah against donor eggs, and there is a clear imperative to “be fruitful and multiply.” Jewish law, in general, defines a child's native religion according to the religion of the mother at the time of birth. 

Most Jewish people embrace egg donation and recognize the child as Jewish

The Reform movement (which comprises about 70% of Jewish people worldwide), defines Jewish identity based on upbringing rather than on genetics. If a child is raised Jewish and has one Jewish parent, father or mother, the child is considered Jewish, and so the issue of a Jewish egg donor is moot

Furthermore, in 1996, The Committee on Jewish Law and Standards of the Rabbinical Assembly stated that “we hold that a child born to a Jewish woman is Jewish, regardless of the religious status of the ovum donor."

Topics to discuss with your rabbi/cantor/spiritual leader

Talking to your spiritual leader can help you find clarity in what this means to you. So much about Jewish identity is about what feels right for you and talking to your rabbi can help you parse these things out. Here are some sample topics you can discuss:

• How important is it that the egg donor is Jewish? 
• What if the egg donor converted, but was not born Jewish?
• What if I’m carrying the baby? What if a gestational carrier is carrying the baby?
• What is more important, that the donor looks like me or is Jewish?
• If we choose an egg donor who is not Jewish, do we need to convert the child to Judaism? How soon can we do so if we need to?

How to find a Jewish egg donor

Cofertility is a human-first fertility ecosystem rewriting the egg freezing and egg donation experience. Our Family by Co platform serves as a more transparent, ethical egg donor matching platform. Our unique model empowers women to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime. Our donors aren’t doing it for the cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use, and donate half to your family.

Join now for free to begin searching for Jewish egg donors!

Rabbi Julie Bressler serves as the Associate Rabbi & Educator at Temple Sinai in Oakland, CA. She is very proud to be co-aunts with Lauren to two wonderful nephews and one awesome niece. Rabbi Bressler is passionate about encouraging folks to live their Judaism, however they define it, proudly and fully in the public and private spheres. She is an advocate for social justice, especially reproductive access, and is grateful that Cofertility exists to help individuals have more agency in their fertility journeys.

The path to parenthood can take many roads. There is no single “right way” to become a parent, so you may be debating which path is the right one for you. Two options include egg donation or adoption. If you’re asking yourself “should I adopt or find a donor?” then this article is for you.  Let’s delve into some of the pros and cons to see what feels best for you and your future family. 

Egg donation

The first child born from egg donation was reported in Australia in 1983 and the first American child born from egg donation was in February 1984. Before this medical intervention, for most,  adoption was the only path to parenthood. Egg donation opened the door for more people to become parents. With egg donation, those who are experiencing infertility, have high risks of passing on genetic disorders to their offspring, or have dealt with multiple IVF failures in the past, can have children. 

Pros of using donor eggs

• You can fulfill your dream of raising a child and becoming a parent.
• Donor egg IVF has high success rates, allowing childless people / couples to start a family.
• The opportunity to have a child with a biological relation to the father and biologically related siblings.
• If you are biologically female and plan on carrying the pregnancy, you can still experience delivery and nursing.

Cons of using donor eggs

• It can take a long time to find a donor that you connect with.
• It can be expensive, though with our Family by Co platform, we’ve removed cash compensation for donors from the equation. Instead, our members freeze their eggs entirely for free when giving half of the eggs retrieved to your family.
• Loss of a genetic tie to the mother.
• Fear about telling your child and other people in your life
• There are no guarantees that an embryo will be created.

Adoption

Adoption is the legal process through which a person assumes the parenting responsibilities for someone else's biological child. The concept of adoption exists across cultures and countries and may be traced all the way back to 6th century AD Roman Law. During this time, if the family patriarch did not have a male heir, an heir could be adopted. This was important for the Romans because by adopting one another’s sons, the nobility ensured the wealth would stay within a few families. In the United States, the first modern adoption legislation, the Adoption of Children Act, was passed in Massachusetts in 1851. This act required judges to determine that adoptive parents had “sufficient ability to bring up the child” and that “it is fit and proper that such adoption should take effect.” Today, adoption can take many forms - open, semi-open, domestic and international. 

Pros of adoption

• You can fulfill your dream of raising a child and becoming a parent.
• You get to share your love with a child that may otherwise not have had the best opportunities in life. Studies have shown that adoptive children are less likely to abuse drugs or alcohol and more likely to graduate from high school and go on to college than those who remain in foster care. They are also more likely to have successful careers and strong relationships.
• Because you are helping birth parents who may have not otherwise been able to care for the child, the parents can feel at peace knowing their child will be loved and taken care of.

Cons of adoption

• It can take a long time - anywhere from 9 to 12 months - to find an adoption opportunity.
• It can be very expensive. For domestic infant adoption the cost can be anywhere from $40k to $70k and up.
• The birth parent has a right to change their mind. Depending on the state, that may be anytime while pregnant or up to 30 days after the adoption. 
• Since most adoptions are open, there is a chance that the birth parent may want to be a part of the child’s life, and that may be difficult for some adopting parents.
• Different states have different laws on who can become an adoptive parent based on age, sexual orientation and even religious affiliation.

Embryo donation

Embryo donation is typically not the first choice for most couples starting  infertility treatment, but if you have not been successful with traditional infertility treatment using your own eggs and/or sperm, or are having problems finding a donor, this is a great viable option. 

Pros of embryo donation

1. You can fulfill your dream of raising a child and becoming a parent.
2. Because the embryos are already created and readily available, you can get started whenever you are ready.
3. Can be less expensive than egg and sperm donation and adoption.
4. You can still experience pregnancy, delivery, and nursing.
5. There won’t be a genetic imbalance if only one partner uses a donor.

Cons of embryo donation

1. Embryo donation is technically an adoption. Because you may not have all the medical history of one or both the donors, it can potentially introduce some unpredictability into the genetic makeup of the family.
2. Although readily available, because it is an adoption, it can still sometimes take a long time to match with an embryo.
3. There are no guarantees that an embryo transfer will be successful and result in a pregnancy and delivery.

Which one is right for me?

The decision to use medical intervention to conceive a child or to go through an adoption agency to start a family is an extremely personal one. As you can see above, all paths come with their own set of unique challenges. The best thing you can do is become educated in all your options. Get second and third expert opinions. Seek out legal counsel and ask questions. No one but you can make this decision, but whatever decision you choose, know that you are not alone. Many have walked down these roads to have their family and none of them would have done it any other way.

In traditional egg donation, the donor's eggs are given to the intended parents in exchange for cash compensation. However, in the increasingly popular egg sharing model, the donor has the opportunity to keep half of the eggs retrieved for her own future family planning.

At Cofertility, we exclusively work under the egg sharing model, which we call Split, because we think it’s beneficial for everyone involved – the intended parents, the egg donor, and ultimately the donor-conceived child. In this article, we will explore six reasons why we think egg sharing is a compelling model for egg donation, focusing on benefits such as increased donor commitment, the absence of financial implications, and a more diverse pool of potential donors. 

1. Donors have a personal stake in the outcomes, increasing donor commitment 

One significant benefit of the egg sharing model is that donors have a personal stake in the outcomes. When donors contribute a portion of their eggs in exchange for their own IVF treatment down the line, they are invested not only in helping intended parents but also in achieving their own fertility goals. This shared interest leads to a greater sense of commitment and dedication from the donors, potentially resulting in higher-quality eggs and improved success rates.

2. Cash compensation models can lead some egg donors to conceal relevant medical information

The American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM) published specific guidance regarding egg donor compensation in 2021. In this guidance, they acknowledge that excessive monetary compensation could create the possibility of undue inducement and exploitation of egg donors. 

The guidance points out, “Women may agree to provide oocytes based on their financial need. High levels of compensation also could lead some prospective donors to conceal medical information relevant to their own health or that of their genetic offspring in order to be more likely to be selected for oocyte donation.”

However, in the egg sharing model, where the focus is on shared outcomes rather than financial gain, donors may be more likely to disclose any pertinent medical information, ensuring the best possible match and reducing the risk of undisclosed medical issues that may impact the intended parents or the resulting child's well-being.

3. Most donor-conceived people feel the exchange of money for donor eggs is wrong

In the context of egg sharing, compensation is not based on financial transactions. Instead, it focuses on the shared goal of success for both parties. This approach eliminates the potential discomfort and ickiness often associated with cash compensation, and avoids the perception of treating eggs as commodities. 

A 2021 Harvard study found that 62% of donor-conceived adults felt the exchange of money for donor gametes was wrong, and 41% were troubled by the fact that money was exchanged around their conception. This is why we created our Split program.  This unique model empowers women to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime. Our donors aren’t doing it for cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use, and donate half to your family.

By removing financial incentives, the process feels meaningful and preserves the dignity of all parties involved.

4. We’re able to recruit a more diverse pool of donors

Our model not only empowers our donors by giving them control over their own fertility, but it also enables us to recruit a truly exceptional group of donors. Our donors are motivated by the opportunity to help others start their families while also taking charge of their own reproductive futures. By offering this unique Split model, we have been able to attract a diverse and talented group of women who are passionate about helping others and committed to making a difference in the world.

5. Donors get to proactively invest in their own reproductive future

Egg sharing allows donors to actively invest in their own reproductive future while helping intended parents fulfill their dreams of having a child. By keeping half of the eggs retrieved, egg donors are proactively taking steps to preserve their fertility options and increase their chances of successful pregnancies in the future. This dual benefit of participating in the egg sharing model enables donors to make a meaningful investment in their own reproductive health, while simultaneously providing hope and support to intended parents who are seeking to build their families. It empowers donors to take control of their reproductive journey and make decisions that align with their long-term family planning goals.

6. Donors are happy with their decision

One compelling reason to consider egg sharing is the high level of donor satisfaction and positive experiences reported by individuals who have participated in this model. According to one study, the vast majority of egg share donors are happy with their decision. In fact, a significant majority of egg share donors, 83.3%, said they would even donate again. 

This statistic reflects the positive impact and personal fulfillment donors experience through their participation in the egg sharing process. Only 2.1% regret their decision, underscoring the fact that the decision to participate in egg sharing is often met with a sense of satisfaction, knowing that their contribution has made a meaningful difference in someone else's life. The positive feedback from donors highlights the mutually beneficial nature of the egg sharing model, reinforcing the notion that it can be a rewarding and fulfilling experience for all parties involved.

Cofertility - striving to be the best egg sharing program

We aim to be the best egg sharing program, providing an experience that honors, respects, and uplifts everyone involved. Here’s what sets us apart:

• Baby guarantee. We truly want to help you bring your baby home, and we will re-match you for free until that happens. 
• Donor empowerment. Our model empowers donors to preserve their own fertility, while lifting you up on your own journey. It’s a win-win.
• Diversity: We’re proud about the fact that the donors on our platform are as diverse as the intended parents seeking to match with them. We work with intended parents to understand their own cultural values — including regional nuances — in hopes of finding them the perfect match.
• Human-centered. We didn’t like the status quo in egg donation. So we’re doing things differently, starting with our human-centered matching platform.
• Lifetime support: Historically, other egg donation options have treated egg donor matching as a one-and-done experience. Beyond matching, beyond a pregnancy, beyond a birth…we believe in supporting the donor-conceived family for life. Our resources and education provide intended parents with the guidance they need to raise happy, healthy kids and celebrate their origin stories.

At Cofertility, the average number of mature eggs a family receives and fertilizes is 12. Some intended parents want to do two egg retrievals with the donor which is definitely possible. We also ask each of our donors whether they are open to a second cycle as part of the initial application — many report that they are!

You can see how many eggs are retrieved in the first cycle and go from there. If, for any reason, the eggs retrieved in that round do not lead to a live birth, our baby guarantee will kick in and we’ll re-match you at no additional match deposit or Cofertility coordination fee.

We are obsessed with improving the family-building journey — today or in the future — and are in an endless pursuit to make these experiences more positive. Create a free account to get started today!

The concept of single motherhood has evolved significantly over the years, with increasing numbers of women opting to start families without a partner. According to Single Moms by Choice (SMC), over half of all people pursuing sperm donation are single mothers. Furthermore, 78% of them are between the ages of 36-45. 

While this decision can be influenced by various personal circumstances, some single women face infertility challenges, necessitating alternative methods to fulfill their dreams of becoming mothers. Egg donation has emerged as an option, providing hope and possibilities for single moms who wish to experience pregnancy and the joys and rewards of raising a child.

This article explores the process of egg donation, its benefits, ethical considerations, and the emotional journey of single mothers who choose this path. By shedding light on this topic, we aim to provide a comprehensive understanding of egg donation for single moms and its potential impact on their lives.

How egg donation works

Egg donation involves a collaborative process that encompasses donor selection, egg retrieval, fertilization, embryo transfer, and pregnancy. It begins with the careful selection and screening of an egg donor, ensuring compatibility with your preferences and medical requirements. Once the donor has been approved by your fertility doctor, we help facilitate all the rest (legal, financial, insurance, and cycle planning). 

The egg donor then undergoes ovarian stimulation to produce multiple mature eggs, which are then retrieved through a minimally invasive procedure. These eggs are then fertilized with donor sperm in a laboratory setting. Finally, one or more viable embryos are transferred to the uterus of the mother (or a gestational carrier), who prepares her body for pregnancy through hormone treatments.

Success rates of donor eggs

The success rates of egg donation for single moms depend on several factors, including the quality and quantity of eggs retrieved, the expertise of the fertility clinic, and the general health of the intended mother. Pre-qualified egg donors typically yield higher success rates due to the higher quality and quantity of their eggs. The experience and proficiency of the fertility clinic in handling the process also significantly influences the outcome. And finally, your health and pregnancy history can impact chances of implantation and live birth. 

The good news is that the chances of success with donor eggs has more to do with the age of the donor than the age of the mother (or gestational carrier). As you can see from the chart below, the chances of getting pregnant per cycle is much higher with donor eggs than your own eggs, and the gap only increases with your age. 

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Read Dr. Meera Shah’s article Donor Egg Success Rates: a Breakdown.

At Cofertility, the average number of mature eggs a family receives and fertilizes is 12. Some intended parents want to do two egg retrievals with the donor which is definitely possible. We also ask each of our donors whether they are open to a second cycle as part of the initial application — many report that they are!

You can see how many eggs are retrieved in the first cycle and go from there. If, for any reason, the eggs retrieved in that round do not lead to a live birth, our baby guarantee will kick in and we’ll re-match you at no additional match deposit or Cofertility coordination fee.

Maternal bricolage

In a Wellesley study exploring the experiences of single mothers by choice who opted for egg donation, an interesting phenomenon emerged: the concept of maternal bricolage. Maternal bricolage refers to the process of choosing and combining the "right materials" (sperm and egg) to create a child who would resemble and connect with the mother and her extended family. 

“Like bricoleurs, they do not create the pieces. Instead, their artistry resides in the selection and arrangement of the pieces in a particular order or geometry. Making the claim to being a creator, inventor, originator, or inspiration and to having shaped the genetic makeup of the embryo was for these women essential to crafting a compelling and socially legitimate claim to motherhood.”

The women interviewed in the study faced difficult choices during the early stages of conception, hoping to create a child who would not feel physically out of place and would share similar interests and traits.

For instance, Jamie, a single mother who gave birth to her son at the age of 43, emphasized the importance of her child not feeling like an outsider. Jamie wanted to ensure her child would not feel physically different from her or their extended family. She recognized the influence of interests and talents, questioning the nature versus nurture debate. By selecting a donor who shared similarities with her, Jamie hoped to provide her child with a sense of familiarity and reduce the potential feeling of being an outsider.

This concept of maternal bricolage highlights the thoughtful and intentional decision-making process of single mothers by choice using egg donation. By actively seeking out donors who possess physical characteristics, personality traits, or talents that align with their own or their family's attributes, they aim to create a sense of belonging and connection for their child, shaping their perception of self-identity and reducing potential challenges associated with being donor-conceived.

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The Wellesley study sheds light on the depth of consideration and care that single mothers invest in the conception process. It reveals their commitment to not only providing a loving and nurturing environment but also striving to create a strong physical and emotional resemblance between themselves and their children. It emphasizes the profound desire to create a family structure that mirrors their own identities and fosters a deep connection between mother and child. 

Benefits of egg donation for single moms

Advanced maternal age, medical conditions affecting fertility, or the absence of a male partner can make it difficult to conceive naturally. Egg donation offers an opportunity to bypass these obstacles and fulfill the desire for motherhood. And for many women, egg donation gives the opportunity to still carry the pregnancy and breastfeed. 

Making the decision to pursue egg donation as an intended single mother can be complex. We recommend all intended parents pursuing donor eggs seek emotional support, whether that’s counseling or support groups. You are not alone. Connecting with other single mothers by choice who have experienced similar journeys can help you better navigate the process and foster emotional readiness.

In that Wellesley study referenced above, participants had this to say about their journeys:

 “I do believe I had a huge role to help the fetus grow and determine what kind of child it would ultimately be because of epigenetics. There were three of us involved—two donors and me—and I believe my input was still significant.” - Jamie

“Wow this egg donor thing doesn’t matter, it just doesn’t matter. She’s my child, she’s 100 percent my child. I carried her. I’ve breastfed her, birthed her. This is not to say that I don’t think about the egg donor but this child is mine.” - Gail

“What’s so crazy about this process is that my daughter would have never existed without me, being as I am the one to connect these two genetic materials.” - Yasmin

Find an amazing egg donor at Cofertility

At Cofertility, our program is unique. After meeting with hundreds of intended parents, egg donors, and donor-conceived people, we decided on an egg donation model that we think best serves everyone involved: egg sharing.

Here’s how it works: our unique model empowers women to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime. Our donors aren’t doing it for cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use, and donate half to your family.

We aim to be the best egg sharing program, providing an experience that honors, respects, and uplifts everyone involved. Here’s what sets us apart:

• Baby guarantee. We truly want to help you bring your baby home, and we will re-match you for free until that happens.
• Donor empowerment. Our model empowers donors to preserve their own fertility while lifting you up on your own journey. It’s a win-win.
• Diversity: We’re proud of the fact that the donors on our platform are as diverse as the intended parents seeking to match with them. We work with intended parents to understand their own cultural values — including regional nuances — in hopes of finding them the perfect match.
• Human-centered. We didn’t like the status quo in egg donation. So we’re doing things differently, starting with our human-centered matching platform.
• Lifetime support: Historically, other egg donation options have treated egg donor matching as a one-and-done experience. Beyond matching, beyond a pregnancy, beyond a birth…we believe in supporting the donor-conceived family for life. Our resources and education provide intended parents with the guidance they need to raise happy, healthy kids and celebrate their origin stories.

We are obsessed with improving the family-building journey — today or in the future — and are in an endless pursuit to make these experiences more positive. Create a free account to get started today!

Read more:

• Adoption vs Egg Donation: How Do I Choose?
• I'm Thinking of Using a Sperm Donor...How Does It Work?
• Double Donor IVF: Making Embryos with Donor Eggs and Sperm
• Will I Regret Using Donor Eggs?

Maybe you’ve already found your Cofertility egg donor. Or, you know you want to work with us and are in search of the perfect match. This is an exciting time in your family building journey, and you probably feel a broad mix of emotions. Whether you’re eager, relieved, or even a little bit nervous for what happens next(!), now it’s time to get through some logistics related to the fertility clinic.

In general, Cofertility can work with any US-based fertility clinic that reports their results to SART (Society for Assisted Reproductive Technology) and works with a certified lab. Or, if you’re outside of the US, the donor can undergo her retrieval at one of our partner clinics, and have them shipped to your clinic worldwide. 

If you have not yet selected a clinic, we’re happy to suggest one from our network of preferred providers. If you’re already working with a clinic and want to stay with them, we support you continuing to work with your existing care team. 

We recommend that intended parents focus first and foremost on finding your perfect match. Then we can work together to determine the path forward with your clinic. But, to ensure that you feel prepared for all that’s to come, we’ve compiled a list of a few core questions that are important to  ask any clinic you’re considering. Let’s jump in.

“Are you open to overseeing a cycle with a Cofertility egg donor who meets all FDA and ASRM guidelines?”

As it turns out, a small number of clinics have exclusive relationships with specific agencies or egg banks and limit their patients to working with donors from those organizations. Most, however, are open to giving their patients more options and allowing them to work with any agency, provided the donors meet all necessary guidelines and criteria.

If you’re working with a Cofertility egg donor, the donor’s screening, medication, and retrieval protocols will all follow the clinic’s standard processes. From the clinic’s perspective, the only difference between working with a Cofertility donor or another fresh agency donor is that the yield of mature eggs will be split into two lots on the day of the retrieval. One half will be fertilized for your use and the other half will be vitrified for the donor’s future use.    

If you’re working with a clinic that we haven’t done a cycle with before, we’ll set up time with their third party team to walk them through our program and answer any of their questions related to clinic operations, finances, and the like.

Depending on your family-building goals, you may opt to do two cycles with the donor. If this is something you’re thinking about or something that your physician recommends, rest assured that many of our donors are excited about the opportunity to do two cycles and we can work with any clinic to make this happen.

“Can you provide any clinic-specific criteria my egg donor needs to meet?”

Occasionally, fertility clinics will have their own additional criteria (above and beyond what the FDA or ASRM outlines) based on their preferences and/or your own unique circumstances. Some examples of this may include the donor’s:

• Family medical history
• Specific genetic testing results 
• BMI
• AMH
• Mental health criteria
• Lifestyle habits
• Age

You can let your doctor know that all of our donors are pre-qualified by our clinical operations team with support from our medical advisors (who are REIs). Donors must be under 34, have a minimum AMH of 2.0, and meet all FDA and ASRM guidelines.  

“Are you open to the egg donor completing any part of the process outside of your clinic?”

Cofertility’s Split program is nationwide, meaning that you may match with a donor who is not based in the same city as you. All of our donors have discussed this possibility with our team and most have confirmed that they are open to travel.  If your perfect match is unable to travel, we can always find a way to work with a clinic local to her. 

Occasionally, an egg donor may need or request to complete some of her appointments at a fertility clinic near her home. For context, travel can be harder for those donors whose work or school schedules do not support remote work or lots of time off (for instance, if she is a medical resident or a teacher).

Once we know where your match is located, we will work with her and the clinic to ensure we follow their standard processes. However, it can be helpful to understand whether — and for how long — your clinic  requires donors to be in-person so you can plan and budget accordingly. 

For the donor’s initial set of screening appointments, clinics travel policies can vary.  Some fertility clinics would rather have the donor come in person for screening so they can ensure the testing and overall process meets clinic-specific standards or to streamline logistics. On the flipside, some clinics are open to the donor completing this screening locally and then reviewing screening reports from other clinics. In those cases, the clinic will likely want to verify that the clinic where she does her screening has quality outcomes and solid protocols in place.  

When it comes time for the cycle, many clinics are open to having the egg donor complete her initial two to three ultrasound and bloodwork monitoring appointments at a clinic near her. It is more unusual for a clinic to require the donor to be on-site throughout the entire cycle. If she does do the initial appointments at home, she’ll likely need to travel for the last few days of the cycle so she can do her retrieval at your clinic.  

If your clinic’s donor retrieval policies lean more rigid (i.e., they’re going to want the donor there for most of the cycle), we recommend considering the following options upfront: 

• Work with an egg donor who will travel: Travel preferences are one of the main topics of discussion when we connect with each of the women on our egg donor matching platform. While this information is not on her profile, please reach out to our team at support@cofertility.com if you’re interested in a particular donor and we can let you know where she’s based and whether she’s open to travel.  
• Work with a donor who is semi-local: Our egg donors span the entire country, with more and more women added to our platform every week. Working with an egg donor who lives within driving distance of your clinic (e.g. she’s in NYC and you’re in Philadelphia) may mean fewer logistical challenges with your clinic. 
• Work with a clinic near the donor: If your perfect donor match happens to be someone who cannot travel, one way to circumvent this challenge is to actually work with a clinic that’s local to her. We are happy to make a recommendation and ensure that you feel comfortable with your physician and whole care team. In this case, your donor will do all of her screening and monitoring at that clinic. For the retrieval, you can either ship frozen sperm or travel to the clinic to provide a fresh sperm cycle. Then, you can choose to either do the transfer at that clinic or ship those frozen embryos back to your clinic for transfer. Before going this route, we recommend confirming that your clinic will accept embryos made at another clinic/lab (many will provide the clinic with documentation about their lab protocols). Another benefit of this approach is that you don’t have to cover the costs associated with her travel.  

Summing it up

When considering working with Family by Co, it is crucial to be armed with the right questions to ensure that you have a comprehensive understanding of the process and make informed decisions about your family building journey. By asking the right questions, you can gain valuable insights into your clinic’s policies, procedures, and success rates, allowing you to make an informed choice about partnering with a fertility clinic that collaborates with our egg donor program. If you’d like to talk to a member of our team about how our program, click here to book a 1:1 call

The path to fatherhood is unique and full of individual choices and circumstances, and for gay dads looking to start or expand their families, egg donation can be an essential part of this journey. As you navigate the world of egg donor agencies, myriad questions might arise. Here's a detailed guide with some of the top questions to ask your egg donor agency as a gay dad.

1. Understanding the process

What is the entire egg donation process and timeline?

Understanding the full process from selecting an egg donor to implanting the embryo is crucial. Make sure the agency explains each step, the involved costs, legal aspects, and the expected timeframe.

What experience do you have with gay parents?

Understanding how the agency supports gay dads can provide valuable insights into their experience and capabilities in assisting gay couples.

Can you help me find a clinic?

Partnering with the right clinic is a critical aspect of the journey to fatherhood. Ask the agency if they have affiliations or can provide recommendations for reputable fertility clinics. Their experience and network in the field can guide you to a facility that aligns with your needs, location, and values, ensuring a cohesive and supportive process from start to finish.

2. Choosing an egg donor

What criteria are used to approve your egg donors?

Ask about the screening process, including medical, genetic, AMH, psychological, and background checks. Understanding the agency's criteria will provide you with assurance about the quality and suitability of potential donors.

Can I meet the egg donor?

This question is vital if you want to know more about the donor's personality, motivation, and background. Some agencies allow this, while others may only provide non-identifiable information. (At Cofertility, we do offer virtual match meetings).

Read more in Should I Meet My Potential Egg Donor? 

3. Financial aspects

What are your fees and when are they due?

The entire egg donation process can be expensive, so make sure to ask for a detailed breakdown of all costs, including the agency's fees, legal fees, and any other unexpected expenses. Keep in mind that medical expenses are usually dependent on the clinic you work with and not the egg donation agency. Learn more about Cofertility pricing here. 

What payment plans or financial assistance are available?

If cost is a concern, explore payment options or if they can recommend any available financial assistance programs. At Cofertility, we've partnered with lenders to offer you fertility financial resources. Sunfish offers the most comprehensive marketplace of financial options for egg donor IVF.

How are the donor’s expenses handled?

Do they offer an escrow account to easily facilitate payments related to the donor’s egg retrieval? 

What if I want to do two cycles?

Is there a reduced cost for a second cycle? At Cofertility, the answer is yes. 

4. Legalities and contracts

What legal agreements are required?

Understanding the legal landscape of egg donation is paramount. Inquire about necessary contracts and whether legal consultation is provided or recommended.

What happens if the donor withdraws or can't proceed?

Make sure you understand the contingencies if the chosen donor is unable to proceed.

Do you offer a baby guarantee?

What happens if the egg donor cycle does not lead to a baby? Will the agency help match you again? (At Cofertility, the answer is YES). 

If the donor is out of state, do I need to switch clinics to one near her?

Some agencies, like ours, make matches nationwide. You’ll want to know how that works if you already have an existing clinic. If you match with one of our donors, we’ll work with both parties to determine the best place to conduct her testing, monitoring, and retrieval. In some cases, we will complete the donor’s testing and monitoring at a clinic close to her home to eliminate travel and can have the eggs shipped to your clinic. In other cases, donors will travel to your clinic for the retrieval.

5. Other important details

How does your agency support the donor?

Understanding how the egg donor is supported throughout the process is a reflection of the agency's professionalism and care. Ask about the educational, medical, and emotional support provided to the donors, including counseling, support, and follow-up care. This question ensures that you align with an agency that respects and takes proper care of all parties involved in this deeply personal process.

What emotional support is available?

The journey to parenthood through egg donation can be emotionally taxing. Ask about available counseling or support groups that are sensitive to the unique needs of gay dads.

What are the agency's ethical policies?

Understanding the agency's stance on ethical issues, such as compensation for donors, informed consent, and privacy, is crucial. 

Are you part of SEEDS or any other industry organizations?

SEEDS is a nonprofit organization founded by a group of egg donation and surrogacy agencies, whose purpose is to define and promote ethical behavior by all parties involved in third party reproduction. Cofertility is a proud member.

Choosing to create a family through egg donation is a beautiful journey, and as a gay dad, you may face unique questions and considerations. The above guide can help you navigate the sometimes complex world of egg donation, but remember, these questions are just a starting point.

Every family's journey is different, and you may have concerns specific to your situation. Don't hesitate to ask those questions, too. Open communication with your chosen agency is vital in ensuring that they can meet your individual needs and expectations.

As you embark on this incredible journey to fatherhood, arm yourself with knowledge, seek support where needed, and trust in the professionals guiding your path. The road may be complex, but the joy of holding your child in your arms is a destination that promises to make the entire journey worthwhile.

Remember, becoming a parent is not just about genetics; it's about love, commitment, and the capacity to provide a nurturing environment. Your decision to explore egg donation is a significant step toward fulfilling your dream of fatherhood, and asking the right questions will help you make informed and confident choices along the way.

Find an amazing egg donor at Cofertility

At Cofertility, our program is unique. After meeting with hundreds of intended parents, egg donors, and donor-conceived people, we decided on an egg donation model that we think best serves everyone involved: egg sharing.

Here’s how it works: our unique model empowers women to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime. Our donors aren’t doing it for cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use, and donate half to your family.

We aim to be the best egg sharing program, providing an experience that honors, respects, and uplifts everyone involved. Here’s what sets us apart:

• Human-centered. We didn’t like the status quo in egg donation. So we’re doing things differently, starting with our human-centered matching platform.
• Donor empowerment. Our model empowers donors to preserve their own fertility, while lifting you up on your own journey. It’s a win-win.
• Diversity: We’re proud about the fact that the donors on our platform are as diverse as the intended parents seeking to match with them. We work with intended parents to understand their own cultural values — including regional nuances — in hopes of finding them the perfect match.
• Baby guarantee. We truly want to help you bring your baby home, and we will re-match you for free until that happens.
• Lifetime support: Historically, other egg donation options have treated egg donor matching as a one-and-done experience. Beyond matching, beyond a pregnancy, beyond a birth…we believe in supporting the donor-conceived family for life. Our resources and education provide intended parents with the guidance they need to raise happy, healthy kids and celebrate their origin stories.

We are obsessed with improving the family-building journey — today or in the future — and are in an endless pursuit to make these experiences more positive. Create a free account to get started today!

As a reproductive endocrinologist (aka a fertility doctor), every day I witness firsthand the profound yearning to build a family. For many individuals and couples, the path to parenthood may not be a straightforward one. Fortunately, advancements in assisted reproductive technologies (ART) have opened doors to alternative family-building options. Third-party reproduction (TPR) can offer hope for those facing fertility challenges or seeking alternative means to complete their families. But what is it?

In this article, I'll dive into the world of TPR, exploring its various facets, the science behind it, and the unique considerations involved. Whether you're a couple struggling with infertility, a single parent by choice, or an LGBTQ+ individual seeking to build a family, understanding TPR can empower you to make informed decisions about your fertility journey.

What is third-party reproduction?

When you hear the term third-party reproduction, it’s referring to a range of techniques that involve using genetic material or gestational services from a third party, someone who is not the intended parent, to achieve pregnancy. This broadens the possibilities for those who may not be able to conceive using their own gametes (eggs and sperm) or carry a pregnancy themselves. Here's a breakdown of the types of TPR:

• Sperm donation: Viable sperm from a carefully screened donor is used to fertilize eggs through intrauterine insemination (IUI) or in vitro fertilization (IVF).
• Egg donation: Donor eggs, retrieved from a healthy egg donor who has undergone rigorous medical and psychological evaluation, are fertilized with the intended father's sperm or donor sperm for implantation in the uterus via IVF.
• Embryo donation: Frozen embryos created by another family undergoing IVF are donated to another couple or individual for implantation. 
• Gestational surrogacy: A gestational carrier, also known as a surrogate, carries a pregnancy for the intended parents using an embryo created either through the intended parents' own gametes or donated sperm and eggs. The gestational carrier has no genetic link to the baby.
• Double donor: Both donor sperm and donor egg come together in IVF. 

More and more families are turning to third-party reproduction to build their families. Third-party reproduction is part science and medicine, and part generosity from someone else who wants to help you build your family. There is a lot of coordination and legal work involved to protect all parties, and if you work with a group like Cofertility, we will help you all along the way. 

What types of families use third-party reproduction?

Third-party reproduction (TPR) opens doors for a diverse range of individuals and couples who may not be able to conceive unassisted or carry a pregnancy to term. I have worked with so many different types of families, who come to me for various reasons. Here's a closer look at some of the families who find hope and fulfillment through TPR:

• Couples facing infertility:  Infertility, the inability to conceive after one year of unprotected intercourse, affects millions of couples worldwide. TPR can offer hope for those struggling with infertility due to various factors including low sperm count, blocked fallopian tubes, or hormonal imbalances.  For these couples, TPR, whether through sperm donation, egg donation, or even embryo donation, allows them to experience the joy of parenthood and build their families.
• Single parents by choice:  An increasing number of single intended parents are opting for TPR to build their families. They can utilize sperm donation, egg donation, and/or surrogacy to create their dream families.  
• LGBTQ+ families: TPR plays a significant role in expanding family-building options for LGBTQ+ individuals and couples. Same-sex male couples can utilize egg donation and surrogacy to have a biological child within their family. Lesbian couples have the option of using sperm donation, either from a known or anonymous donor, and either partner can carry the pregnancy or utilize a gestational carrier.  Transgender individuals can also explore TPR options to complete their families.
• Individuals with medical conditions:  Certain medical conditions may render pregnancy unsafe or even impossible. Uterine fibroids, endometriosis, or a history of complex medical procedures or births are just some examples.  TPR, through gestational surrogacy, allows these women to experience parenthood by having a genetically related child (through egg donation and sperm from their partner) or by adopting an embryo.
• People with genetic concerns:  For couples at risk of passing on a known genetic condition to their biological children, TPR offers a path toward a healthy family.  Preimplantation genetic diagnosis (PGD) can be performed on embryos created through IVF, allowing for the selection of embryos free from the identified genetic condition.  This can give couples peace of mind and increase their chances of having a healthy child.

Regardless of the specific route taken through TPR, the common thread is the unwavering desire to build a loving family.  While genetics play a role, the emotional bonds cultivated through love, nurturing, and shared experiences are the true cornerstones of a family. Studies have shown that children born through TPR thrive in loving environments and develop strong attachments to their intended parents.

The emotional journey of TPR

The decision to pursue TPR is rarely made lightly. It's often born out of a deep longing for parenthood and may be accompanied by a spectrum of emotions. Intended parents may experience a mix of hope, excitement, anxiety, and sometimes even a sense of grief if facing infertility or the inability to use their own genetic material. Open communication is absolutely vital – between intended parents, with any known donors or gestational carrier, with your agency, and within oneself.  Exploring personal feelings and expectations throughout the process  is essential for ensuring everyone is emotionally aligned.

Donors and gestational carriers also carry complex emotional feelings throughout the process.  Donors may derive a sense of altruism and fulfillment from helping others build families.  Gestational carriers often express feelings of deep satisfaction from carrying a child for intended parents who cannot do so themselves.  However, feelings of uncertainty, potential vulnerability, and even moments of hesitation are also natural parts of the experience.

Psychological support in the form of counseling provides a safe space to unpack these emotions for everyone involved.  It can help intended parents cope with potential setbacks, foster healthy communication with stakeholders, and build a strong emotional foundation as they navigate their unique path to parenthood.

If you work with Cofertility, we have a fertility psychologist on our team who supports all parties involved. 

Do I need a doctor who specializes in third-party reproduction?

The short answer is yes! Building a family through third-party reproduction involves a mix of medical, legal, and emotional considerations. While seeking guidance from any fertility doctor is a good starting point, partnering with a board-certified reproductive endocrinologist who specializes in TPR will go a long way. These specialists possess in-depth knowledge of the various TPR techniques, from sperm and egg donation to embryo donation and gestational surrogacy. Their expertise allows them to create tailored treatment plans that perfectly align with your unique circumstances – whether that means selecting the right donor, navigating IVF procedures, or understanding complex legal agreements.

A fertility doctor with TPR experience understands the potential risks and necessary medical monitoring throughout the process. They ensure your safety and well-being, always keeping your best interests in mind. Perhaps just as importantly, they offer compassionate support throughout your emotional journey, answering any questions and providing a safe space to process the complex feelings that may arise.  Building a trusting relationship with your doctor is important when making personal decisions that affect your ability to build a family.

Finding the right specialist takes a little research. Look for board-certified reproductive endocrinologists affiliated with reputable fertility clinics that offer comprehensive TPR services. Ask for recommendations from trusted sources or schedule consultations with a few specialists to find a provider whose approach aligns with your needs. Ask them about their experience with TPR, and how they approach treatment differently. Ultimately, a specialist in TPR will be your invaluable guide, increasing your chances of a positive outcome on your path to creating the family you've always dreamed of.

Summing it up

Third-party reproduction (TPR) is a powerful testament to where science and compassion meet. It expands our horizons of possibility, offering alternative paths to parenthood for many individuals and couples. Whether it's sperm donation, egg donation, embryo donation, or working with a gestational carrier – the techniques behind TPR are ever-evolving, giving more people the chance to fulfill their dreams of family.

While the science is complex, the heart of TPR is simple: it's about love, determination, and the generosity of those who offer the incredible gift of helping others build their families. Naturally, navigating the medical, emotional, and legal aspects of TPR necessitates a guiding hand. That's where a specialized reproductive endocrinologist, a team like Cofertility, and a strong support system are invaluable, turning what can seem daunting into a well-supported, empowering journey.

If this is a path calling to you, know that you're not alone. Seek out the knowledge and support that will enable you to make informed choices and feel confident at every step along the way.  The joy of parenthood, experienced through whichever means resonate with you, is a beautiful path of unwavering love.

Find an amazing egg donor at Cofertility

At Cofertility, our program is unique. After meeting with hundreds of intended parents, egg donors, and donor-conceived people, we decided on an egg donation model that we think best serves everyone involved: egg sharing.

Here’s how it works: our unique model empowers women to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime. Our donors aren’t doing it for cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use and donate half to your family.

We aim to be the best egg-sharing program, providing an experience that honors, respects, and uplifts everyone involved. Here’s what sets us apart:

• Human-centered. We didn’t like the status quo in egg donation. So we’re doing things differently, starting with our human-centered matching platform.
• Donor empowerment. Our model empowers donors to preserve their own fertility, while lifting you up on your own journey. It’s a win-win.
• Diversity: We’re proud of the fact that the donors on our platform are as diverse as the intended parents seeking to match with them. We work with intended parents to understand their own cultural values — including regional nuances — in hopes of finding them the perfect match.
• Baby guarantee. We truly want to help you bring your baby home, and we will re-match you for free until that happens.
• Lifetime support: Historically, other egg donation options have treated egg donor matching as a one-and-done experience. Beyond matching, beyond a pregnancy, beyond a birth…we believe in supporting the donor-conceived family for life. Our resources and education provide intended parents with the guidance they need to raise happy, healthy kids and celebrate their origin stories.

We are obsessed with improving the family-building journey — today or in the future — and are in an endless pursuit to make these experiences more positive. Create a free account to get started today!

Read more:

• Double Donor IVF: Making Embryos with Donor Eggs and Sperm
• Reciprocal IVF: What Should My Partner and I Consider?
• Gay Men Having Babies: Four Genetic Options with Donor Eggs

For many international intended parents, working with an American egg donor offers a path to parenthood that combines high medical standards, a diverse donor pool, and well-established legal protections. If you're considering this route, you're not alone. The United States has become a popular destination for international intended parents seeking egg donation services, thanks to its advanced reproductive technologies and comprehensive donor screening processes.

In this article, we'll explore the advantages of working with American egg donors and guide you through the process as an international intended parent. We'll cover everything from matching with a donor to understanding additional considerations unique to your situation.

Advantages of working with an American egg donor agency

Choosing to work with an American egg donor comes with several benefits:

1. High medical standards: The U.S. has some of the world's most advanced fertility clinics and stringent medical regulations, ensuring high-quality care throughout the process.
2. Diverse donor pool: America's large and multicultural population means you're more likely to find a donor who matches your family, whether that's in terms of ethnicity or personality. 
3. Comprehensive screening: U.S. agencies like Cofertility typically conduct thorough genetic and medical screenings of potential donors, providing you with detailed health information.
4. Legal protections: The U.S. has well-established legal processes for egg donation, offering clear protections for all parties involved.

Understanding the process

Timeline: The egg donation process can take several months from start to finish. This includes time for matching with a donor, medical screenings, legal processes, and the actual medical procedures.

Matching with a Cofertility donor: At Cofertility, we offer two primary options for egg donation: fresh egg donation and frozen egg donation.

Fresh cycle donation: If you match with a donor who is undergoing a  fresh cycle, you'll need to work with a U.S.-based fertility clinic. While you don't have to reside in the U.S., you'll need to establish care with the clinic and provide a sperm sample, which may require an in-person visit. Cofertility can help you select a clinic in a city you're likely to visit or where your chosen donor is based, minimizing travel for all parties.

Frozen egg donation: If you match with a donor whose eggs are already frozen, her retrieval would have taken place in the US but these eggs may be able to be  shipped to your home clinic, potentially eliminating the need for you to travel to the U.S. Note that countries have varying laws around accepting frozen eggs - we share more on this below.

All Cofertility donors undergo comprehensive medical clearance before donation, and our services come with our Baby Guarantee, providing additional peace of mind for intended parents.

Disclosed vs. undisclosed relationships: You'll have the option to choose the type of donor relationship that works best for your family.  In a disclosed arrangement, you and the donor may share identifying information and potentially maintain contact. An undisclosed arrangement means that there are no names or contact information exchanged  between the two parties.

Parentage and citizenship considerations

While we can't provide specific legal advice, it's important to consult with a lawyer experienced in international reproductive law. They can guide you on issues of legal parentage and potential citizenship considerations for your child, especially if you're also working with a surrogate.

Laws vary significantly between countries, and it's essential to understand how your home country's laws interact with U.S. laws regarding egg donation and parentage. Some countries may require additional steps to recognize you as the legal parent or to grant citizenship to a child born through egg donation.

Shipping eggs or embryos abroad

If you're planning to use the donated eggs or resulting embryos in your home country, you'll need to consider the logistics and legalities of international shipping.

Eggs and embryos are routinely shipped internationally. They can survive in specially designed tanks for over a week, making intercontinental transport feasible. You’ll want to work with a reputable shipping company that specializes in transporting genetic material. These companies understand the delicate nature of the cargo and the strict temperature controls required.

The ability to import eggs or embryos varies by country. Some nations have strict regulations or even prohibitions on importing genetic material. For instance, countries like India and Turkey require special permission from their respective Ministries of Health to import genetic materials. Research your country's specific laws or consult with a local fertility clinic familiar with international cases.

You’ll also want to ensure that your home clinic is equipped to receive and work with shipped eggs or embryos. They should have experience with international cases and be familiar with the protocols for handling shipped genetic material.

How much does it cost to match with a U.S.-based egg donor?

Working with an American egg donor may involve higher costs compared to some other countries. However, many intended parents find the advantages outweigh the additional expense. Be prepared for:

• Agency fees
• Medical procedure costs
• Legal fees
• Potential travel expenses
• International shipping costs (if applicable)
• Donor compensation (with everyone except Cofertility!)

If you work with Cofertility, you won’t have to pay donor compensation. Our unique egg sharing model means donors aren’t doing it for cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use, and donate half to your family. This empowers egg donors to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime.

Visit our pricing page to learn more about costs. 

Summing it up

Working with an American egg donor as an international intended parent offers many advantages, from high medical standards to a more diverse donor pool. While the process involves unique considerations around legal issues, logistics, and cultural differences, with proper planning and support, it can be a rewarding path to parenthood.

At Cofertility, we're committed to supporting international intended parents throughout their journey. Our team understands the unique challenges you face and is here to provide guidance, support, and access to our thoroughly screened egg donors.

Remember, every family-building journey is unique. By choosing to work with an American egg donor, you're taking a significant step towards realizing your dreams of parenthood. With careful planning, open communication, and the right support team, you can navigate this process successfully, no matter where in the world you call home.