How to Talk to Your Partner About Freezing Your Eggs

So, you’ve already taken the first step and decided you want to pursue egg freezing, but now you’re asking yourself, “how do I tell people I’m freezing my eggs?” 

We get it, deciding to freeze your eggs is a huge decision, and talking about it with the people in your life can feel even more overwhelming, especially your romantic partner. However, having an open and honest conversation is a great way to ensure that both of you are on the same page. Here are some tips on how to approach the conversation.

Educate yourself first

Before you try to explain the egg freezing process to your partner, it’s important to have a clear understanding of it all yourself. Your partner is definitely going to have a lot of questions about the process, so make sure to spend some time researching the process, success rates, and cost involved so that you’re prepared to answer their questions. This will also help you approach the conversation with confidence and show that you’re not taking this decision lightly.

Talk about what this means for your future

We know, talking about family-building with your partner can sometimes feel a little uncomfortable, especially if the relationship is still new. However, it’s important to make sure your partner understands what freezing your eggs means for your future family planning (and why you’re choosing to freeze eggs instead of embryos). Whether you know you want to have kids someday or you’re still not sure, freezing your eggs is a great way to give yourself and your partner options down the line. And with Cofertility’s Split program, you can do so without the financial strain, by freezing your eggs entirely for free when you give half to another family. 

Freezing eggs vs. embryos

If you’re in a relationship with a biologically male partner, you may be wondering if you should freeze embryos instead of eggs. While it’s true that thawing success rates can be slightly higher for embryos than eggs (at a 95% survival rate vs 90% for eggs), the downside is that once an egg is fertilized with sperm, there’s no going back, so freezing eggs instead of embryos will give you more options down the line. We know, this might be a little bit of an awkward one to bring up with your partner, but it might come up at some point, so the best you can do is be prepared with the facts.

Prepare for their questions

If you think through the possible questions they could ask, you’ll feel more prepared and confident in answering them. This could include:

• Why are you freezing your eggs?
• What are the potential risks and side effects of egg freezing?
• What if you don’t need the eggs down the line?
• How long can you keep frozen eggs?
• How many eggs should you freeze to maximize your chances of a successful pregnancy?
• How many eggs do you think you’ll get? How many do you want?
• Are there any potential emotional or psychological effects of egg freezing?

Obviously you can’t predict every question that may be thrown your way. And if they ask a question that throws you off, you can just say “Great question, let me think about how to best answer that and get back to you”. 

Revisit the conversation often

Something as important as your fertility and reproductive future should never be a one-and-done conversation, so keep this conversation an ongoing one. It’s likely that your perspectives will evolve over time, so it’s important to keep the conversation fresh so you can address any concerns as they come up. If at any time you or your partner have questions, our team at Cofertility is always here to help.

Summing it up

The decision to freeze your eggs is extremely personal and life-changing in a lot of ways, so it’s crucial that you feel supported in this decision. We know approaching the conversation can be scary at first, but by following the tips we just mentioned, you’ll be able to have an honest, empathetic, open conversation with your partner about your egg freezing journey and your future.