Will a Donor Egg Have My DNA?

One of the things that those considering using donor eggs may wonder about is whether any child born will have their DNA. Every embryo will contain DNA from both the egg and the sperm in equal amounts. While any embryo made from the donor egg will contain the egg donor’s DNA, if this embryo was made from sperm from you or your partner, it will also contain that DNA.

Some of what is being asked here is, of course, what this may mean if your DNA is not part of the embryo (and your child’s) makeup. This is something that many may wrestle with as they navigate this journey. And understandably so — it’s complicated! 

In this article, we'll explain the biology of donor eggs, address common concerns about genetic connections, and share strategies that have helped other parents embrace their donor egg journey.

The short answer 

For intended mothers, a child conceived using a donor egg will not carry your DNA from the egg itself. The egg will contain the donor's genetic material. However, if your partner provides the sperm, your child will have your partner's DNA. While you won't have a genetic connection through the egg, you can still form a powerful bond with your child through pregnancy, birth, and parenting. Plus, new research shows that as the birth mother, you can influence which genes are expressed through a process called epigenetics.

Understanding the genetics

Let's break down how genetic material comes together in conception:

• The egg provides 50% of the genetic material
• The sperm provides the other 50%
• If you use a donor egg and your partner's sperm, your child will have your partner's DNA but not yours
• If you use both donor eggs and donor sperm, your child will carry the genetic material of both donors

Addressing concerns about connection

It can be natural to worry about raising a child that does not necessarily share your DNA. For years you may have dreamed about having “mini-me,” who everybody would know immediately was yours. And you’re not sure you can think of them as yours without this connection. This is a very valid concern, and one that so many intended parents face. 

It may take a little time, but most parents overcome concerns about lacking a genetic connection. A 2014 Reproductive BioMedicine Online study shows that once the child is born, for many parents, concerns about genetics fade away, while belief in the importance of parenting increases. This is what you hear of as “nurture” vs “nature”. 

While the idea of conceiving via donor egg may take some getting used to, it doesn’t necessarily impact how you and your child will interact. Another study of women pregnant with donor-conceived babies showed that during pregnancy 80% of mothers had some concerns about not being genetically related to the child; however, that feeling dissipated after giving birth. For most mothers, having a donor-conceived child did not ultimately influence the relationship they had with their child. So, while the concerns are real and very common, take heart in the fact that others with the same worries as you are happily parenting children who got their start from donor eggs. 

Strategies for embracing donor eggs

While conceiving via donor egg may initially be daunting, it is very possible to successfully navigate this. As the American Journal of Psychology discusses, there are some strategies that have helped other donor recipient parents successfully embrace their roles as parents:

Your unique role in development 

While the egg donor contributes genetic material, as the birth mother you influence which genes are activated through epigenetics. Your diet, stress levels, and health habits during pregnancy can affect how your child's genes are expressed.

Taking control of your story

• Choose an egg donor who fits your family's values and preferences
• Focus on your role in carrying and nurturing the pregnancy
• Remember that strong family bonds exist in many forms, not just genetic ones
• Build connection through pregnancy and early bonding
• Recognize how wanted and cherished your child is
• Value your influence through parenting and nurture
• View egg donation as a medical process, similar to other tissue donation

Making the choice comfortable 

Focus on where you have control of the situation. Choose an ethical and reputable egg donation agency that follows industry guidelines and treats egg donors with care. Consider an egg sharing program, like Cofertility, where the egg donor gets to keep a portion of the eggs retrieved for her own future use. If cash compensation doesn't align with your values, egg sharing offers a compelling alternative that can eliminate discomfort and ethical concerns associated with treating eggs as commodities.

Think about the criteria for the type of egg donor that would be a fit. What’s most important to you and your family?  

The egg donor egg selection process itself can make a difference here. The more you know about the donor, the better you can feel about her being the right choice for your family. That’s why our egg donor matching platform is so incredible — you can truly get to know your egg donor on a human level. 

Thinking about the fact that there are all kinds of families

Keep in mind that in a blended family someone may feel closer to a step-sibling who’s nearer in age or more similar in personality than to a genetic one. Think about friends, in-laws, or step family in your life who you have strong ties to. As you know, biology is only one part of what makes a family.

Nurture is important! Think about how your parenting will influence your child. Knowing how important “nurture” is in the development of children, you can focus on how your parenting will shape who your child becomes. Perhaps, they will have certain mannerisms they have picked up from you or personality qualities that your parenting style may have influenced.

Moving forward

While donor eggs won't carry your DNA, this doesn't diminish the parent-child relationship you'll build. Many parents find that the genetic connection becomes less important as they focus on the joy of raising their child. Your role as a parent shapes your child's development in countless ways beyond genetics.

Remember, there's no single way to create a family. What matters most is the love, care, and dedication you bring to parenting your child.