How Many Times Should I Try IVF with My Own Eggs Before Turning to Donor Eggs?

Going through fertility treatments to build your family is hard enough, deciding when it’s time to move onto donor eggs can feel impossible. It’s not just the genetic tie that you might be thinking about, but also the time, money, and commitment. 

How many attempts with your own eggs are reasonable before considering alternative options like donor eggs? While there's no single right answer, this guide will help you confidently make your decision.

First consideration: your age

Understanding the impact of age on fertility is helpful. Knowing the chances of IVF success with and without IVF can help you predict the chances of it working in either scenario.  

Females are born with a finite number of eggs, and both the quantity and quality of those eggs diminish over time. This decline in fertility accelerates significantly after the age of 35. According to the Society for Assisted Reproductive Technology (SART), the average live birth rate per IVF cycle using a woman's own eggs is around 53% for women under 35, but falls to just 4% for women over 42. These statistics highlight the challenges associated with using your own eggs at an older age.

If you have already spent a lot of time, effort, and money on failed IVF, you may be eager to move forward with donor eggs and have a baby ASAP. The good news is that the chances of success with donor eggs has more to do with the age of the donor than the age of the mother (or gestational carrier). 

The time to match with a donor can be just days (we have hundreds of pre-qualified donors ready to match with your family). After that, a donor cycle with fresh eggs can take 60-90 days from match to completion of the cycle. Frozen eggs can be quicker, but it sometimes means you can’t meet the donor beforehand.  

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As you can see from the SART data above, the chances of getting pregnant per cycle is much higher with donor eggs and the gap increases with age of the patient. 

Read Dr. Meera Shah’s article Donor Egg Success Rates: a Breakdown.

Second consideration: your ovarian reserve

Your fertility doctor will likely perform a series of tests to assess your ovarian reserve – the remaining supply of eggs in your ovaries.  These tests provide a more personalized estimate of your chances of success using your own eggs. Key tests include:

• Follicle-Stimulating Hormone (FSH): A high FSH level, particularly on day 3 of your menstrual cycle, can indicate diminished ovarian reserve.
• Anti-Mullerian Hormone (AMH): A low AMH level suggests a lower egg count and may signify reduced responsiveness to fertility medications.
• Antral Follicle Count (AFC): Performed via ultrasound, this test counts the number of small, developing follicles in your ovaries. A lower count could indicate a lower ovarian reserve.

These hormone tests will give you and your doctor a good idea of your chances of success. In fact, your chances of success with IVF are even more correlated with your AMH than your age. 

Third consideration: the emotional impact of unsuccessful attempts

The journey of infertility often comes with significant emotional burdens. Experiencing multiple unsuccessful attempts with your own eggs can lead to disappointment, frustration, anxiety, and even depression. It's super important to prioritize your mental health during this process. Seek support from therapists specializing in infertility, join support groups, or lean on loved ones for emotional strength.

Think about how many failed attempts using your own eggs you are willing to endure before moving on. And keep in mind, donor eggs may increase your chances of success but they aren’t a guarantee. 

Fourth consideration: finances

Unfortunately, fertility treatments can be costly, and using donor eggs will likely increase those expenses. Before making decisions, have a realistic understanding of your financial resources.  Explore options like insurance coverage, financing plans, or grants that might help offset treatment costs.

Read more in How to Finance Your Infertility or Egg Donation Journey

Fifth consideration: time

Time is a precious factor in the fertility journey, especially as you grow older.  Every month, every cycle, counts. If you've experienced multiple unsuccessful IVF attempts with your own eggs, the time it takes to pursue additional cycles may significantly impact your chances of achieving a successful pregnancy.  And, as you age, it increases the likelihood of a higher risk pregnancy. It's important to consider your desired timeline for building a family and how pursuing further IVF with your own eggs may align with those goals.

When should I switch to donor eggs?

While there's no hard-and-fast rule, your doctor may suggest donor egg IVF if you meet some of these criteria:

• Age over 42: Success rates with own eggs decline sharply after 42, and donor eggs offer a significantly higher chance of pregnancy.
• Diminished ovarian reserve: Test results indicating low ovarian reserve may encourage a quicker transition to donor eggs to increase your chances of success, especially if you’re over age 40.
• Multiple failed cycles or pregnancy losses: After several unsuccessful attempts with your own eggs, it may be time to explore other options to avoid further emotional and financial strain.
• Genetic factors: If you are a carrier of a genetic condition, using donor eggs can minimize the risk of passing it on to your child.

Ultimately, the decision of whether to continue with IVF using your own eggs or transition to donor eggs is deeply personal. There is no right or wrong choice.  The best way to navigate this decision is through open communication with a trusted fertility doctor, a counselor, fertility coach, or even a religious leader if your faith plays a significant role in your family planning decisions. They can assess your individual circumstances, discuss the pros and cons in greater detail, and help you make a decision that aligns with your goals and values.

Remember: There is no shame in using donor eggs. It's a testament to your unwavering desire to build a family. Choosing donor eggs empowers you to take control of your fertility journey and create the family you've always dreamed of.

Finding your path to parenthood

The journey to parenthood can take many unexpected turns. While the desire for a biological connection is understandable, remember that the love you have for your future child transcends genetics.  If you decide to move forward with donor eggs, you're making a powerful choice based on love, commitment, and your unwavering determination to build a family.

Donor eggs offer a path to parenthood that might have seemed impossible before. Don't hesitate to explore this option with open-mindedness and a willingness to learn.  Connect with agencies like ours that specialize in egg donation, we can guide you through the process, address your concerns, and provide the support you need throughout your journey.

You are not alone. Communities, support groups, and mental health professionals specializing in infertility can offer invaluable support and understanding.

Remember: Building a family is guided by love. Whether through your own eggs or through the generosity of a donor, you are embarking on a beautiful journey toward fulfilling a profound desire.

Read more:

• I'm a Fertility Psychologist. Here's What I Want You to Know About Growing Your Family Through Egg Donation
• Does Using Donor Eggs Decrease the Chance of Miscarriage?
• Six Reasons Why Egg Sharing is a Better Egg Donation Model for Intended Parents